


Trapped

by orphan_account



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Angst, Bottom John, Daddy Kink, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-20
Updated: 2014-09-20
Packaged: 2018-02-18 03:23:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2333453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John is bound and gagged on the bed as Sherlock prepares him, enjoying every bit of it, until he's hit with a panic attack that leaves him feeling trapped and helpless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Trapped

John was positively writhing on top of Sherlock’s sheets, moaning and drooling around the ball gag in his mouth. His hands were tied tightly behind his back and Sherlock had two fingers in his hole, thrusting in and out mercilessly.

John closed his eyes at the sensations washing over him, Sherlock’s long, talented fingers filling him up. He let out another moan and wriggled on the bed, desperate for any type of friction.

“Oh, John.” Sherlock breathed. “What did I say about bad boys not being allowed to come? You’ll come when daddy says so, and I’m not finished with you just yet.”

“Mmm,” John groaned, feeling even more saliva drip freely from his mouth and onto the pillow.

“That’s it, such a good boy, letting daddy’s fingers fill you up. What do you think, John, should I add another?”

John nodded furiously and all but whimpered when Sherlock withdrew his fingers to add more lube. It gave John a moment to open his eyes and take a deep breath, and in the split second after he exhaled, he felt a sudden and unexplainable surge of panic. He had no idea where it came from, but all he could feel in that moment was a distinct, solid desire to _leave_. His mind was screaming ‘ _stop stop stop’_ but all that came out of his mouth was another pitiful groan.

“I told you, John, you’ll get to come when daddy’s done fucking you, and not a second before, is that understood?” Sherlock said as he thrust three fingers inside John’s wet and open hole.

John tried to scream and squirm away, but was firmly held in place by Sherlock’s strong hand, making the anxiety in his chest swell even further.

“Oh no you don’t, you be a good boy and stay still for me. God, you’re gorgeous like this.”

“Nnngh,” John wished he could speak because the noises that were coming from him were clearly being misinterpreted by Sherlock as sounds of pleasure and want.

John had been prone to panic attacks ever since he’d come back from the army, but they almost always had a trigger of some sort. He knew it was possible for the panic to strike out of the blue, but those instances were so rare that he had almost forgotten it could still happen.

John and Sherlock had agreed that when John was gagged, he would safeword by kicking up his right foot, but as Sherlock pumped his fingers in and out him and continued to whisper filthy nothings, John felt like he couldn’t move. He fidgeted and tried to get away from Sherlock, but he felt so heavy, like his lungs were full of lead.

“Nng, mmhh,” John slurred, trying desperately to get Sherlock’s attention.

“Mm, such a naughty little thing. Just wait until I have my cock inside you. You want it, don’t you?”

_No,_ John thought, _No no no,_ he shook his head from side to side, praying that Sherlock would see the gesture. Tears spilled from his eyes as he clamped them shut.

John was so trapped in his own head that he barely felt it when Sherlock’s fingers left him and Sherlock crawled up the bed to be next to him.

“John?” Sherlock’s voice sounded muffled, fuzzy, far away. John couldn’t quite focus on it. He didn’t even realize that he’d started shaking.

“John? What’s going on? Can you hear me?” His voice was a little clearer that time, and John finally came back around when he felt Sherlock untie his bound wrists.

John’s arms slumped to his sides and laid limp near him as they were released. Sherlock immediately undid the ball gag from John’s mouth and tossed it to the side.

“Say something, John. Are you alright? What do you need?”

John stretched out his sore jaw before attempting to talk.

“I…mm, Sh’lock,” he mumbled, eyes still a little unfocused. Sherlock sprang up from the bed and was back in under a minute with a cold, damp flannel that he put to John’s forehead.

“Hmm…s’nice.” John said. Everything began to come back into focus when Sherlock started to brush the cloth along his face, gently wiping the sweat from his brow and clearing away any tears.

“Breathe, John, it’s alright. You’re safe, it’s okay now, just breathe.”

Sherlock continued to wipe John down as he took deep, full breaths. Sherlock went to his wrists and carefully massaged them, sliding the cloth over every one of his fingers.

“Deep breaths, in and out, just focus on my voice.”

Sherlock got up and retrieved a thin blanket that was hung over his chair and laid it over John, just up to his shoulders. He quickly made himself decent, pulling on some pants and pyjama bottoms before sitting back on the bed near John.

“Come on, you can’t be comfortable laying like that.” Sherlock said. John nodded lazily in agreement and let Sherlock assist him in turning him over onto his back. “How do you feel?”

“Better.” John whispered. His breathing was finally back to normal and he no longer felt trapped or panicked. All that was left now was the usual exhaustion he felt after an attack like this. He knew he’d just need some rest and something to keep him calm for a few hours and he’d be alright.

“Thank god,” Sherlock let out a sigh of relief. “I’m so sorry, John. I had no idea, I thought—I’m sorry, I didn’t—“

“It’s okay, Sherlock.” John reassured. “I tried to tap my foot like we agreed, but I just couldn’t—“

“No, it’s not your fault. I should’ve been paying more attention. I should have _realized—_ I’m such an idiot. I’m sorry.”

John smiled softly as he looked up at Sherlock. “It’s fine, love. I’m okay now. That’s never happened before. I don’t really know what came over me.”

Sherlock settled in next John, careful not to crowd him.

“You don’t need an explanation, it’s nothing you can control. Just tell me what you need right now.”

“Hm…I think I wanna get cleaned up and get some clothes on first, then can we just watch a movie on the sofa for a bit? Maybe even cuddle a little?”

Sherlock rolled his eyes playfully. “You know how I loathe _cuddling_ , John.” He joked.

“Very funny. And some tea, too, I think. That always helps settle my nerves.”

“Earl grey?”

“Yes.”

“An obscene amount of sugar?”

“Yes.” John laughed.

“On it.”

 

 


End file.
